Why I Wrote Grandma’s in Heaven

By Michael Carter

When I was a child, I was confused. I yearned for someone to explain things to me in a gentle way—not to have them thrown at me. Instead, death hit me without warning. I struggled to swallow it, and I struggled even more to digest it.

The day I learned my father had died, I didn’t understand what those words meant. Adults spoke in hushed tones. Fear hung in the air, and I watched faces change, but no one slowed down to explain what was happening in a way my young mind could hold.

That moment stayed with me. I didn’t just lose my father; I lost my sense of safety. I also lost the space where I could ask “why?” without being told to be quiet or “be strong.”

That experience planted the seed for Grandma’s in Heaven.

The Silence That Followed

In the days that followed, adults rarely talked about the loss in a way a child could understand. People said, “He’s gone,” but I didn’t know where “gone” was. Others said, “He’s in a better place,” but I couldn’t picture it.

At night, I lay awake and imagined every possible “place” a person could go. I tried to translate words that came without care. The adults around me hurt too; however, they didn’t know how to explain death gently to a child.

Like many children who lose someone they love, I learned to stay quiet. I stopped asking questions. Even so, the questions never left; they simply moved deeper inside.

Years later, I realized I didn’t need a perfect answer. I needed connection. A steady voice, spoken softly and slowly, would have helped me carry what I felt.

That understanding still sits at the center of Grandma’s in Heaven.

Why I Wrote the Book

I wrote Grandma’s in Heaven because I want parents and caregivers to avoid what I went through. I want to give families words that feel kind, gentle, and age-appropriate.

I also wanted a story that doesn’t throw death at a child. Instead, it walks beside them through it.

Children experience loss differently than adults. Their world is smaller but more vivid, and they notice tone, silence, and body language before they understand words. As a result, when adults rush through grief explanations—often because they fear their own feelings—children can feel confused or afraid.

I want to change that pattern.

This book helps parents open a door that feels impossible to open: the conversation about death. It offers a simple starting point and a clear message: “It’s okay to ask, it’s okay to cry, and it’s okay not to understand everything right away.”

A Gentler Way to Talk About Loss

Grandma’s in Heaven isn’t just a story. It works as a conversation in the form of a picture book, and it aims to comfort, explain, and reassure.

The book introduces Heaven in a soft and loving way, as a place of peace, warmth, and memory. At the same time, it acknowledges sadness without letting it turn into despair. It also helps children understand that although someone they love may be gone physically, love itself doesn’t disappear.

For the adult reader, it offers a way to speak without fear of “getting it wrong.” You can read it aloud when words feel hard to find, and you can use it to start your own conversation. In addition, you can return to it later because children revisit grief as they grow.

I built the rhythm, illustrations, and tone for one purpose: to help children feel safe enough to ask questions and comforted enough to listen.

A Tool for Parents, Not Just a Story for Children

Most parents don’t get trained for grief conversations. Yet when loss comes, you still have to find the words, choose the tone, and stay present while your own heart hurts. That is a heavy burden.

I created something you can lean on—words that feel thoughtful, gentle, and structured. The goal is to help you guide the conversation rather than get pulled into panic, avoidance, or forced optimism.

I did not write this book to erase pain. I wrote it to guide families through it together.

What I Hope Families Take Away

If a child closes this book feeling loved, seen, and less afraid, it has done its job.

If a parent finishes reading it and realizes they can talk about death without breaking their child’s spirit, it has done its job.

If a teacher uses it in a classroom and it opens a conversation that helps even one child speak about their loss, it has done its job.

I hope Grandma’s in Heaven becomes a quiet companion for families—something they can return to in the days and years after loss. Grief isn’t one moment; rather, it is a process. Children revisit it over time, and they understand it differently at each stage.

Why “Grandma” Matters

I chose “Grandma” in the title deliberately. For many children, a grandparent becomes their first experience of death. Often, it is the first person they’ve loved deeply who dies, and that loss opens a thousand questions:

Where did she go?
Can she still see me?
Will she ever come back?
Will I die too?

I want to meet those questions with compassion.

Through this story, children see that Grandma’s love remains constant. They learn that Heaven isn’t something to fear; instead, it offers another way of being loved. They also see their feelings mirrored in the story and begin to understand that sadness doesn’t mean forgetting.

Writing From Experience

I know what it means to carry grief from childhood into adulthood. I also know how silence and confusion can echo for years.

Writing Grandma’s in Heaven helped me heal. It let me revisit that lost little boy inside me and finally give him the words and comfort he never received.

I wrote every sentence from experience. Empathy guided every illustration. This is not a theoretical book—it’s a personal one.

How to Read This Book With Your Child

Parents often ask how to use a book like this during such a sensitive time. Here is a simple approach:

Choose a quiet moment. Avoid times when your child is overstimulated or distracted.
Read slowly. Let the words breathe. Children process meaning through rhythm and repetition.
Pause often. Ask gentle questions like, “What do you think that means?” or “How do you think the child feels?”
Reassure. Make it clear that their feelings—sadness, confusion, even anger—are okay.
End with connection. Share a comforting memory or a loving detail about the person who has passed.

Each reading will feel a little different. Sometimes your child will just listen; other times they’ll ask questions or share memories. The goal isn’t to finish quickly. The goal is to build gentle, steady conversations that help your child feel less alone.

A Final Word to Parents and Caregivers

If you are walking through loss with a child, please know this: you are not alone.

No one delivers a perfect grief conversation. What helps most is honesty, love, and presence. Children remember tone, patience, and whether they felt safe to cry. Above all, they need your steadiness—your willingness to stay close even when things are painful.

That’s what I hope Grandma’s in Heaven helps you do: stay close.

Ready to learn more about the book? Visit the main book page here: Grandma’s in Heaven.

Helpful Links

Buy the Book

If you’d like to purchase Grandma’s in Heaven, you can find it on Amazon here:

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About the Author

Michael Carter writes from deeply personal experience about loss, love, and the emotional language of childhood. His work focuses on helping families navigate difficult topics with gentleness and clarity. Grandma’s in Heaven helps children and adults find words for grief and brings comfort to families facing loss together.